You Might Be From a Small Town If...

You can name everyone you graduated with.
You get a whiff of manure and think of home.
You know what 4-H is.
You ever went to "headlight parties".
You used to drag "main".
You said the 'f' word and your parents knew within the hour.
You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones will bust you and which ones won't.
You ever went cow-tipping.
You have ever partied with a guy who is 25,has no job, but is the 'buyer' for all of the best parties.
You have parties at the same guy's house.
Almost everyone in your school also has a cousin in your school.
School gets canceled for state sporting events.
The town's social events are their children's.
You could never buy cigarettes because all the store clerks knew how old you were and if you were old enough they'd tell your parents anyway.
When you did find someone old enough and brave enough to buy smokes, you still had to go out to the country and drive on back roads to smoke them.
Social acceptance in town depended on the approval of the five old, rich hags who met each morning at the donut shop for the latest smut.
You were ever in the Homecoming parade.
You have ever gone home for Homecoming.
You run to the store for milk and it takes you an hour.
No place sells gas on Sunday.
Friday night fun consisted of standing in line for the one screen theater to see a movie that came out six months ago.
When the theater was sold out, you spent your Friday night watching truckers and drinking coffee at the truck stop, the only place open after10:00.
It was cool to date someone from the neighboring town.
You have ever gone for a walk in the cemetery, on a date.
You ordered your wardrobe out of a catalog.
You had senior skip day.
The whole school went to the same party after graduation.
You had to drive an hour to buy a pair of socks.
Whenever you decided to walk to school for exercise, twenty cars pulled over and offered you a lift.
You could set your bookbag out in the hall at lunchtime and it would still be there when you came out of the cafeteria.
There were three generations of your family in the same bleacher row at every home game.
You know all the old veterans carrying the flags in the 4th of July parade.
You know everybody in the 4th of July parade.
Your only newspaper was a weekly.
The mini-mall you now shop at has more stores than your entire home town.
Loitering isn't a bad thing, it's the only thing.
The Shell station and IGA are the only franchised businesses in town.
When there's a funeral in town, everything closes except the Shell station and the IGA.
You refer to THE stop light.
You don't give directions by street names or house numbers, but by references ("Turn right by Harold's Hardware, go two blocks past Andersons', and it's the fourth house on the left past the football field.)
YOU CALL LUNCH-DINNER AND DINNER- SUPPER!!!!!!
This is where I added my own entries.
You go away to college and your freshman class is larger than the population of your hometown.
During hunting season your classmates bring their deer to school to show off.
You learned to drive a tractor before a car.
You don't think cow tipping is funny, because you've had to pick one up after it's been tipped.
The manager of the grocery store (the only one in town) knows everyone on a first name basis.
When you park at a store you don't lock your car/truck...ever.
You don't keep the front door to your house locked.
Your fire hall has BINGO every Monday night.
If you're not home, the UPS driver knows where you work and will deliver your package to you there.
Houses have yet to be numbered for 911 because the fire department knows where everyone lives.
Your police chief was one of the guys that everyone picked on in high school...and now he's exacting his revenge.
You got your hunting license before your driving license.